Nature

I recently did a blog post for Portland Moms Blog on Filling the Mama Well and how it's not just one well, but three: mind, body, and spirit. For me nature fills all my wells and an important factor in self-care.

What do I mean when I say Nature?

According to the Webster's Dictionary the definition of nature is "the physical world and everything in it (such as plants, animals, mountains, oceans, stars, etc.) that is not made by people." That means going outside on my balcony and sitting in the sun, listening to the birds in the near by trees, and feeling the wind on my face is part of nature.

Now to be honest, I much rather go for a long walk on an empty beach and stand in the surf, breathing in the revitalizing ocean air or hike to the the many gorgeous waterfalls in the Columbia River Gorge and smell the rich, earthy forest scents, but when that isn't possible I can make time for nature right here in my home.

Spending time in nature is a key element to filling the mind, body, and spirit well, but also provide healing from the harsh energies that surround modern life.

So how does nature fill the wells?

Mind. There are many studies out there that show the benefits of nature. For example one study done at Stanford showed a decrease in anxiety and improvement in cognition. These are just two of the many ways fills the mind well. For me a hike in the woods, calms my mind, gives me clarity in decision-making, and the endorphin boost from the physical movement give me the feeling of well-being.

Body. Humans are made to move, when we don't things don't go so well. Exercising outside only adds to the abundance positives from nature. First of all when you are out in the park all of your senses are being exposed to nature. The fresh air helps with detoxifying your body when you exercise. A simple walk through the local park not only fills the mind well, but your body's well too.

Spirit. Nature is one of the best ways to feed the soul. Nature inspires creativity, nature sounds heal, and nature smells uplift. Take a moment and go outside. Take off your shoes and let your feet touch the earth. Focus on cool feeling of the dirt or grass touching your soles. What do your feel? Do you feel pulled down deeper as if growing roots into the earth? To your toes tingle? Follow whatever you are feeling for a few minutes and then come back to your body. How do you feel now? Chances are you are feeling pretty grounded. This is my go -to exercise when I feel like the world is pulling me in every direction.

Here are some other nature tips that have helped me:

• Walking around the playground at the park while my daughter plays
• Standing in the grass bare-foot for 5-10 minutes
• Sitting on a rock near a river or stream and sticking my feet in the water
• Watering the flowers and plants on my balcony
• Weeding the planters and pruning the dead flowers 
• Taking a 15-20 minute jog through a nature park
• Drinking my morning tea or a glass of water outside on my balcony
• Watching the sunset or sunrise
• Doing 15-20 minute yoga stretches outside in the park or on my balcony
• Dedicating a weekly hour to a specific "hobby" in nature like hiking, kayaking, biking, skiing, paddle-boarding, snorkeling, or whatever is appropriate for the season you are in and location you live in.

 OK, now it's your turn. Please share your nature tips below in the comments.

Last days of Summer

Hi ya'll!

Welcome back to Urban Goddess Revealed. So many things have changed in my personal and professional goals over the summer. From the beginning, my goal for this blog was to empower women, moms in particular, but really all females in general. The world is a hard place and though woman have come a long way, there is still so much more work to do in regards to equality, balance, and creating.

The world we are living in today is not the same as our mother's or grandmother's. Roles are constantly changing for both men and women. Society demands keep growing. The modern mother should be able to keep a home, raise her children, succeed in her career, and be the gracious doting wife, mother, and supportive member of the community. I say bull shit. Living to those kind of expectations is ridiculous. I tried once (twice, okay many times) and crashed hard. It's just not sustainable. Yes, we women are powerful, strong, and amazing creatures, but we still have our limits. Those limits change from day to day and we need to be aware of them. And like Elizabeth Gilbert said in one of her interviews, women today don't have roll models to look up to as did our mothers and grandmothers, so we keep peeking into each other's lives to see what is working and not. That's why I started this blog, so you could have a peek into my life and see if there is something I'm doing that might help you in yours. Heavens know, I'm not saint or have it all figured out. Far from it. We are all treading new ground. We are in this story together.

This summer as I took time off for my family and myself, I learned many things about myself.

• I'm a people-pleaser. Half of my problems stem from this. Life is too short to waste time on people who don't want to rise above their situation and live a better life. Going through a heart-breaking situation this summer has lead me to care less about what people's opinions of me are. I do my best to be kind to everyone around me, if that's not enough for you, well too bad.
• I crave financial freedom. Last winter I discovered Kate Northrup's Money: a Love Story and it has changed my life. While on our 10 year anniversary vacation at the beach, sitting on the porch, looking out over the ocean, with a glass of wine in my hand, I realized that I wanted more of this. In order to have more of this, I needed to make a few sacrifices in the next couple of years to get myself in a position to have what I desire. Being able to enjoy more time with my family in my favorite setting requires financial freedom. The first step for me, enroll in school to finish my bachelor's degree, which I did while on vacation. Second, start a business that will grow bringing in residual income. I've already started this step as I am now a published author of 2 books with more on the way.
• I need to take better care of myself. Two years ago when I started my battle with postpartum depression, I learned the importance of self-care which lead me to starting this blog. I walked my talk until about 8 months ago when I fell off the bandwagon flat on my face in the mud pit. This summer dealing with family issues, job stress, and yet another bout of depression really put things in perspective again. And since I started the bachelor's completion program last week, self-care has now become a very strong component if I'm going to succeed in my higher education endeavors.
• I want to add value to this world. Therefore in the next few months to a year, I will focus this blog on self-care, because this is a valuable topic all woman, and men too, can use more of. In this day and age of technology and the constant rush to get somewhere, it's easy to forget to take care of the mind, body, and spirit. When we take care of ourselves, we can bring more value in the world around us.

 So with all that, starting September 1, I will be posting once a month on the first of the month on a topic related to self-care. With full-time school and work on top of writing, this is all I can do right now. I love to write, but I want to make sure that what I'm putting out there is valuable to you, therefore I'm limiting my blogging to one a month. Quality instead of quantity.

I don't know about you, I'm super excited about arrival of fall. This summer has been very stressful and hot and now I'm ready for some cold weather, rain, cider, pumpkin lattes, and crisp mornings. Don't get me wrong, I really enjoyed summer. How could I not?  My summer was full of concerts, beach trips, and family time. Yes, this summer was good, stressful, but really good.

But that doesn't take away from the fact I'm ready for my favorite season of the year- Fall.

Hello Summer!

Hello Urban Goddesses & Gods,

The last couple of months have been a whirlwind of activity and personal life drama (that part not so fun). The craziness threatened to take over super-alien invasion-like and then June rolled around and I inhaled the freshness of summer.

To summarize the madness, here are a few highlights and see pictures at the end of the post:

• Health issues
• Loss of a friend battling depression
• Another bought of depression of my own
• Urban Goddess Mama-to-Be releases!! Yay! Click here for more info.
• Starting of a new book. Another yay with a splash of "oh crap, are they going to like this one?"
• Friend's wedding 
• Birthdays (Hubby's 40th and mine and no I'm not going to tell you how old I am)
• Day job stress learning a new database system
• New laptop (birthday gift from Hubby! BEST. MAN. EVER.)
• Birth Without Fear Portland Meet-up
• AND Portland Moms Blog

Phew! And that's not all, but I'm not going to bore you any longer. As June is about to wrap up, I will be taking the summer off from blogging, except for Portland Moms Blog.

Summer is a time to celebrate family , nature, and the gift of life. This summer I'm going to focus on that. We're taking a family vacation to the beach to celebrate our 10 year anniversary, Boo Creature and I will also be taking a couple of trips to visit out-of-state family, and there will be lots of concerts, music festivals, camping, and outdoor activities throughout.

I'm absolutely excited about taking a summer off to enjoy family time. I won't totally be off because I still have my day job, but I'm also taking a little time off from that too.

So enjoy your summer, my divine friends! I'll be back early September and with some really exciting news to share with you (it's still in the works and I can't talk about it yet.)

I leave you with a few pictures, as promised.

Much love,
Melania

Boo Creature all dressed up for the wedding.

Book Baby #2 is out!!!!

Birth Without Fear Meet-Up! January Harshe is the ultimate mama goddess.

This was my first real book-signing event. I met some amazing women who really inspired me. For more pictures of the event you can click here.










Finally this is how I spent my Birthday. Massage, pedicure, and new haircut. If you can't practice self-care on your birthday, then when can you?

Dear Daughter

Dear Daughter,

Every day I spend with you, I'm completely blown away by your grown. Each day I will you transform from a toddler into an independent child complete with strong opinions and curious ideas. You're imagination is unbelievable.

Last night as you fell asleep and rolled over to press your little soft cheek to mine and hold my other cheek with your little hand, I thought I had died and gone to heaven. I could have stayed like that forever and been happy as can be. I love our snuggle time so much. It teaches me to slow down and to be present. 

Some days I see myself in you clear and true, others your father's personality comes through, but most days I look at you and I see just you, a sweet, energetic, curious girl who's in love with life and her pink bear.

I love watching you play. You are so funny and the little jokes you tell yourself are hysterical. I wish I could capture these moments as save them forever. Pictures and videos help just don't quite cut it.

I hope you see how much I love you and know I'll always be there to snuggle with you at night or hold you when you're having a bad day. You are my sweet child and I am so honored when you call me mama. Thank you for choosing me to me your mama. I'm certainly not perfect and I've made plenty of mistakes. We're on this journey together. Thank you for your patience.

Can't wait to see what's next, but right this second, I'm really enjoying this moment we have together and will treasure it forever.

Love you to the end of the universe and back,

Mama

Why I loved Kill Bill

Huh? Why would I write a post about two extremely violent films on a zen goddessy blog? Good question and hear me out.

Back in 2003 & 2004 when the films came out, I had ZERO desire to watch them. Yes, I love action and films depicting strong females, but from the previews these just looked way over the top. As I got older my taste for action films weakened especially after I had my daughter.

Photo via IMDB

Then when my daughter was about twelve months old she went to sleep early and I was in the mood for some mommy entertainment. As I browsed Amazon Prime I came across Kill Bill Vol 1.

What the hell, why not. I punched in my password, poured myself a glass of wine, and began watching. The beginning of the film where she takes out the first lady and kills her in front of her daughter was enough to make me stop the film right there, but I kept watching.

I nearly dropped my glass of wine the moment when she wakes up in the hospital and she realizes she no longer is pregnant. My uterus cramped when she let out that belly-clenching scream. In that moment I knew her pain and understood what she was going to do.

Photo via IMDB

Any mother would understand this woman's mission. Every cell of my body could relate with mama bear instinct to find her child and do everything necessary to get her baby back.

Yeah, twelve years ago, if I'd watched these films I'd have been like, "whatever." But now, I get it and I applaud Quentin Tarantino for creating such a brilliant film that truly depicts the inner mama bear.

If anyone dared hurt my baby or attempt to take her away from me, beware. I will learn the art of Japanese-sword fighting. I will track you down. And I will inflict justice upon your sorry ass. I will cut you down. Do not mess with my inner warrior goddess named Beatrix Kiddo.

You have been warned.

Smartphone Apps for New Moms

In this day and age of technology there are apps for everything! Here are a list of free apps* that have made my life much easier:

1. iBaby. This app tracks all the activities your pediatrician will ask you in the first months of a baby's life, like feeding, peeing, pooping, and sleep. It also gives you week to week general information of where your baby should be on the growth and development. This app was a life saver for me, because I could never remember if it'd been two hours since I'd last nursed or how many pee diapers I'd changed in one day. This is a must have for all new mamas.
2. White Noise. Sleep gets majorly disrupted when baby arrives. Anything to help you get back to sleep between feedings or for a nap is golden. I used this app so many times for myself, but also for my daughter. It proved to be a lifesaver when I traveled with my daughter and she needed a nap. This allowed her to nap anywhere.
3. 7 Minute Workout. Once you're approved by your medical provider to begin exercising, this app is a great way to sneak in a workout when you feel like you can't hit the gym or don't have time to take an exercise class. It doesn't sound like much, but the first time I tried the 7-minute routine, I had my ass handed to me...
4. Skip Deep. This app is a great tool to checking how safe are the baby products and cosmetics you may be using. You can scan the bar code on the product and it will tell you give you a rating on the level of toxicity. We want to protect our families!
5. Red Cross First Aid. There are many Red Cross apps for each disaster, but downloading the First Aid important. Sometimes when an emergency situation comes up, having a quick reference can save a live. Since I live in earthquake country, I have the earthquake app on my phone. It notifies me when there is seismic activity in my area and if there should be a big one, it will notify where the nearest shelter is to my location. Plus Red Cross offers tips and how to plan for emergencies. Never hurts to be prepared.
6. Netflix. When you are stuck in the rocking chair with a sleeping baby at your breast, you'll be happy you've got access to your favorite shows.
7. Kindle or Nook. For the same reason you need Netflix, an e-reader app is a sanity saver for a new mama. No pages to turn and perfect for one hand use. 

 Go forth and be smart with your smartphone!

*All the links are listed for Android phones because that is what I have, but these are also available for iphone too. 

Captured Beauty

The last week has been really hard on me. Been functioning on 4-6 hours of sleep for almost two weeks while dealing with final edits for Urban Goddess Mama-to-Be (coming out at the end of this month!, working full-time through a new database conversion, and life in general. When life gets crazy like this, it's hard to remember the good stuff. Thank goodness my husband is a photographer and captured these precious moments of beauty.
Half of the time I feel like the shittiest mom on the planet, but then I see these pictures and am encouraged. Maybe I'm not so terrible. They inspire me to be the best that I can and not worry about the rest. As Mother's Day approaches my heart swells with love when I see the captured beauty in these photos. Enjoy.